Cars
Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Cars should be sized like cars, not yachts. The interior's supposed luxury environment looks like it's straight out of 1989. If every old taxi driver at the airport drives one, you shouldn't.
Alternatives: Hyundai Genesis, a new toupee, Buick Enclave
Base USD Price: $46,525
Ideal Owner: 89-year old widower who stares straight ahead when reversing out of the parking lot at Del Boca Vista. Poor fella'.
Necessary Incentivizing B4 Purchase: Buy 1 Lincoln Town Car, receive 1 free Ford Focus RS from Europe with SVA included.
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part Vi
HUMMER H2 SUT Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: If you want to look like you're in the army, go join the army. As a vehicle's dimensions grow, so to should its capacity to accomplish things for its owner - the H2 SUT carries little but requires a...
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part Ii
BMW X3 Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Abhorrent styling. Incomprehensible dynamic deficiencies. Overwhelmingly better rivals. Alternatives: Audi Q5, Mercedes-Benz GLK350, BMW 328i xDrive Sports Wagon Base USD Price: $38,850 Ideal Owner: Reginald, a recent...
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part I
ACURA ZDX Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Acura's MDX, the ZDX's donor vehicle, was actually pretty decent to begin with. The ZDX is less than the MDX when it should be more; and more than the MDX when it should be less than.... in all the wrong...
- The Bad 8 V3.0 - Part Vi
LEXUS HS250H Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Styling appears to have been done by somebody who wondered what a Toyota Corolla would look like with a can of ugly poured on top. Nobody should want a low-powered front-wheel drive luxury car. This is anti-fun...
- The Bad 8 V2.0 - Part V
LINCOLN TOWN CAR Your mission: with hidden camera securely fastened in order for the sales representative's fact to be clearly visible, head to your local Lincoln dealership and exclaim your lifelong enthusiasm for the Town Car. Describe how badly...
Cars
THE BAD 8 v3.0 - PART VII
LINCOLN TOWN CAR
Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Cars should be sized like cars, not yachts. The interior's supposed luxury environment looks like it's straight out of 1989. If every old taxi driver at the airport drives one, you shouldn't.
Alternatives: Hyundai Genesis, a new toupee, Buick Enclave
Base USD Price: $46,525
Ideal Owner: 89-year old widower who stares straight ahead when reversing out of the parking lot at Del Boca Vista. Poor fella'.
Necessary Incentivizing B4 Purchase: Buy 1 Lincoln Town Car, receive 1 free Ford Focus RS from Europe with SVA included.
CLICK HERE FOR THE BAD 8 v3.0 PART VI
CLICK HERE FOR THE BAD 8 v3.0 PART VIII
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part Vi
HUMMER H2 SUT Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: If you want to look like you're in the army, go join the army. As a vehicle's dimensions grow, so to should its capacity to accomplish things for its owner - the H2 SUT carries little but requires a...
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part Ii
BMW X3 Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Abhorrent styling. Incomprehensible dynamic deficiencies. Overwhelmingly better rivals. Alternatives: Audi Q5, Mercedes-Benz GLK350, BMW 328i xDrive Sports Wagon Base USD Price: $38,850 Ideal Owner: Reginald, a recent...
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part I
ACURA ZDX Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Acura's MDX, the ZDX's donor vehicle, was actually pretty decent to begin with. The ZDX is less than the MDX when it should be more; and more than the MDX when it should be less than.... in all the wrong...
- The Bad 8 V3.0 - Part Vi
LEXUS HS250H Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Styling appears to have been done by somebody who wondered what a Toyota Corolla would look like with a can of ugly poured on top. Nobody should want a low-powered front-wheel drive luxury car. This is anti-fun...
- The Bad 8 V2.0 - Part V
LINCOLN TOWN CAR Your mission: with hidden camera securely fastened in order for the sales representative's fact to be clearly visible, head to your local Lincoln dealership and exclaim your lifelong enthusiasm for the Town Car. Describe how badly...