Cars
Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Styling appears to have been done by somebody who wondered what a Toyota Corolla would look like with a can of ugly poured on top. Nobody should want a low-powered front-wheel drive luxury car. This is anti-fun at its worst.
Alternatives: Ford Fusion Hybrid, BMW 3-Series, "finding yourself"
Base USD Price: $34,200
Ideal Owner: The sort of guy (or girl) who frequently makes unbelievable claims about his stereo, the history of her house, the amount of time she spends at the gym, his famous relative, and the fuel economy of "the hybrid I own".
Necessary Incentivizing B4 Purchase: Buy 1 HS250h, receive a penny for everybody who chuckles at you as you drive by.
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part Vii
LINCOLN MKT Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: 99.9% of the time it's not a good sign when you feel forced to refer to the vehicle's front end as a snout. Ford's "lesser" version of the MKT, the Flex, is far more attractive. The bulge between the...
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part Vi
HUMMER H2 SUT Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: If you want to look like you're in the army, go join the army. As a vehicle's dimensions grow, so to should its capacity to accomplish things for its owner - the H2 SUT carries little but requires a...
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part V
FORD RANGER Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Ranger hasn't been redesigned in this century. The design from last century wasn't even all that modern at the time. Do you know how good other small trucks are these days? Alternatives: Tuk Tuk, used...
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part Ii
BMW X3 Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Abhorrent styling. Incomprehensible dynamic deficiencies. Overwhelmingly better rivals. Alternatives: Audi Q5, Mercedes-Benz GLK350, BMW 328i xDrive Sports Wagon Base USD Price: $38,850 Ideal Owner: Reginald, a recent...
- The Bad 8 V3.0 - Part Vii
LINCOLN TOWN CAR Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Cars should be sized like cars, not yachts. The interior's supposed luxury environment looks like it's straight out of 1989. If every old taxi driver at the airport drives one, you shouldn't....
Cars
THE BAD 8 v3.0 - PART VI
LEXUS HS250H
Alternatives: Ford Fusion Hybrid, BMW 3-Series, "finding yourself"
Base USD Price: $34,200
Ideal Owner: The sort of guy (or girl) who frequently makes unbelievable claims about his stereo, the history of her house, the amount of time she spends at the gym, his famous relative, and the fuel economy of "the hybrid I own".
Necessary Incentivizing B4 Purchase: Buy 1 HS250h, receive a penny for everybody who chuckles at you as you drive by.
CLICK HERE FOR THE BAD 8 v3.0 PART V
CLICK HERE FOR THE BAD 8 v3.0 PART VII
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part Vii
LINCOLN MKT Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: 99.9% of the time it's not a good sign when you feel forced to refer to the vehicle's front end as a snout. Ford's "lesser" version of the MKT, the Flex, is far more attractive. The bulge between the...
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part Vi
HUMMER H2 SUT Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: If you want to look like you're in the army, go join the army. As a vehicle's dimensions grow, so to should its capacity to accomplish things for its owner - the H2 SUT carries little but requires a...
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part V
FORD RANGER Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Ranger hasn't been redesigned in this century. The design from last century wasn't even all that modern at the time. Do you know how good other small trucks are these days? Alternatives: Tuk Tuk, used...
- The Bad 8 Supersize V2.0 - Part Ii
BMW X3 Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Abhorrent styling. Incomprehensible dynamic deficiencies. Overwhelmingly better rivals. Alternatives: Audi Q5, Mercedes-Benz GLK350, BMW 328i xDrive Sports Wagon Base USD Price: $38,850 Ideal Owner: Reginald, a recent...
- The Bad 8 V3.0 - Part Vii
LINCOLN TOWN CAR Top 3 Reasons For Avoiding: Cars should be sized like cars, not yachts. The interior's supposed luxury environment looks like it's straight out of 1989. If every old taxi driver at the airport drives one, you shouldn't....